Finding ourselves in God gives us clarity about love and makes us realize that when we’re looking for a mate, we often mistake infatuation for love. Love is selflessness. Infatuation is a desperate need or deep desire for another person. Love produces a lasting relationship while infatuation fizzles and is quickly replaced by disenchantment. Love is not blind–it is wise. Infatuation makes us blind and stupid. What’s the difference between the two?

When we’re truly in love, our relationship is based upon our security in God. We know we are unconditionally loved by God and therefore, we aren’t looking for someone to make us whole. God satisfies us. We are looking to GIVE love and share our life with someone who shares our common purpose to glorify God. Conversely, infatuation produces sleeplessness, euphoria, mood swings, extreme energy, emotional dependence, obsessiveness and possessiveness about the other person, blindness to their bad traits, etc. (Gary Thomas, “The Sacred Search”) Infatuation robs us of the wisdom which enables us to choose love.

When we find our completeness in God, we have the ability to objectively explore a potential relationship without the confusion of infatuation. We are not selfishly and rabidly seeking to be made whole by someone, we can better evaluate their relationship with God, values, work ethic, compatibility, etc. The Bible “But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.” (Matthew‬ ‭6:33‬) http://bible.com/59/mat.6.33.esv. This includes relationships! Infatuation blinds us while it masquerades as love. However, when we love God above all else, we discover that love “seeks not her own” and we’re able to evaluate our relationships based upon God’s standards. (1 Corinthians 13:5)

From the book, “Essential Faith” Volume 2 available on Amazon by clicking HERE .

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